CHRISTOPHER BAKER
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Picture
The player navigates Luna to the Gloomy Goat.
Sir Neew
Oh. *sob* There she is.

Lucifer
Punkin! So good to see you!
We were just chillin’ with our new pal Neew here.

Luna
And what’s he been telling you?

Lucifer
Hard to say, really—all the cryin’.

Sir Neew
I was not *sob* crying.

Luna
Yep. Ardath pretty much grabbed your heart and ripped it to shreds, huh?
I’m here to do the same. Just at a more physical level.

Lucifer
Punkin! Such violent words. Dude’s so cool!

Sir Neew
And yet, she threatens me. And the Kingdom as a whole.
I never asked for a fight, princess. *sob*

Lucifer
He never asked for a fight, punkin!

Luna
He LITERALLY asked for a fight, Dad.

Sir Neew
How can anyone trust such a violent nature?
Did you not singlehandedly eliminate armies? All in league with my traitorous beloved?

Lucifer
Sweetiekins?!...

Luna
Yeah. Kinda.

Sir Neew
Please excuse me, friend Lucifer. Only defeating this menace will protect the few innocent Kingdom lives she has yet to claim.

Lucifer
Seems fair. Do whatcha gotta do.

Luna
DAD!!!

Lucifer
Gotta be objective in this sorta thing, punkin. Leadership.

Luna
Yeah. Right. Your specialty.
C’mon Neew. Let’s finish this.

[Luna battles Sir Neew and defeats him once and for all (for now...)]

Lucifer
Well, punkin—you killed him. I hope you’re happy.

Morzhul
I am.

Luna
The vilest souls do make for the best fuel, eh, Morzy? 

Lucifer
“Vile”? He’s, like, my favorite dude in the Kingdom!

Morzhul
I will transport his soul.

Lucifer
Yes, Morzy. Take him to the Haüntid Haüs. Make him feel at home. Serve him some fried green tomatoes. 
[Contextual Note: The Haüntid Haüs is Lucifer's home. Capital of the Deadrealm.]

Morzhul
My specialty! 

Lucifer
Absolutely scrumptious. Save some for me. 
Later, we shall discuss his place in the Deadrealm.

Luna
His place in the Deadrealm is being harvested by the Spirit Drill—saving the Brimstone Layer!

Lucifer
That is for me to decide. Meanwhile, YOU have some apologizing to do.

Luna
APOLOGIZING?! To whom?

Lucifer
Queen Poppy. You were never to engage in the killing yourself. And you will cease to do so immediately.

Luna
Poppy is the worst.

Lucifer
And just to make sure you don’t accidentally murder some humans…
I’m coming with you.

​NEXT: The Price of Souls
© 2014-2023 Christopher Michael Baker​
  • Home
  • Résumé
  • Portfolio
    • Narrative / Writing >
      • Operencia Writing
      • Circus Electrique Writing
      • CastleStorm II Writing Samples
      • Marvel Writing & Gamedev >
        • Spider-Man: Shattered Dimensions Contributions
        • The Amazing Spider-Man Game Contributions
        • Marvel vs. Capcom 3 Contributions
        • Marvel Pinball Contributions
        • Misc. Quick Hits -- Contributions to Other Games
    • PR & Marketing >
      • Game Trailers
      • Panel Appearances
    • Official U.S. PlayStation Magazine >
      • OPM Features
      • OPM Game Reviews
  • Gameography (Giant Bomb)
  • Fun Stuff
    • Superhero.VG (YouTube)
    • "X-Wings, Lightsabers, and Scorpion Vader: Celebrating Star Wars Video Games"
    • "WRONG! Retro Games, You Messed Up Our Comic Book Heroes!"
    • Willow Talk: A Willow Podcast
    • Featured in Scholastic's "Hot Jobs in Video Games"
    • Medium Blog
  • Kinda Dated (2014)
    • Testimonials
    • Older Portfolio